[On some level, he recognized that both of them exhibited similar signs and defense mechanisms when it came to pending rejection. Both of them walled off, remaining stony and wooden in their body language as they waited for the worse possible outcome when it came to emotional matters. They were both waiting for whatever this was to fail all around them, like a game of chicken to see how close they could come to the line before one of them jumped off and avoided potential personal disaster.
Yet, all of that melted away from him momentarily when his arms slipped around Richard's waist and the younger man seemed to surrender against him. His grip tightened to bring them together, and he continued to rest his forehead to Richard's burn-scarred shoulder, releasing the tension from his shoulders that he was not rejected in return. Just for a few seconds, he savoured this silently.
Never first choice, but underdog was where he operated best anyway. In the shadows he had always been at his best and his worst. In that, it felt as if he and Richard were reflected the same way.]
I'm aware. [He knew that. Jinx sounded off when frustrated and would likely let Richard's identity slip. Probably Ragna, maybe someone else.] Perhaps also admitting it out loud makes it real as well. Until then, we can just... exist in this space of finding each other but not calling it anything. [If it was real, it might force a sort of commitment or to face any budding emotional attachment to each other. His fingers lightly dug into the small of Richard's back at the audacity of it.] So we are both in a position of being unwilling to betray other people. That puts us in a difficult position.
no subject
Yet, all of that melted away from him momentarily when his arms slipped around Richard's waist and the younger man seemed to surrender against him. His grip tightened to bring them together, and he continued to rest his forehead to Richard's burn-scarred shoulder, releasing the tension from his shoulders that he was not rejected in return. Just for a few seconds, he savoured this silently.
Never first choice, but underdog was where he operated best anyway. In the shadows he had always been at his best and his worst. In that, it felt as if he and Richard were reflected the same way.]
I'm aware. [He knew that. Jinx sounded off when frustrated and would likely let Richard's identity slip. Probably Ragna, maybe someone else.] Perhaps also admitting it out loud makes it real as well. Until then, we can just... exist in this space of finding each other but not calling it anything. [If it was real, it might force a sort of commitment or to face any budding emotional attachment to each other. His fingers lightly dug into the small of Richard's back at the audacity of it.] So we are both in a position of being unwilling to betray other people. That puts us in a difficult position.